Saturday, October 25, 2014


I spoke with my granddaughter the other day and one thing she said was very accurate and I could very much relate to.  We were catching up and she was very chatty, we were discussing our next possible sleepover, Halloween, the Parade and she said "Time is going very fast".

It surprised me to hear those words come out of her seven year old self.  It is also something which I myself have noticed over the course of recovering from my surgery.  The time was so slow for the month after I found out that I needed surgery and it seems to have suddenly sped up and life has been somewhat of a blur for me.

I have already been to my two week follow up with the surgeon which came very quickly (or so it seemed to me). Trick or Treat is just around the corner with Thanksgiving not to far after that.  The days have been racing by.

I am finding that there have not been enough hours in the day, or maybe it is just my energy level.  I feel that I am doing very well at this stage of my recovery.  The doctor is amazed at how well I am doing as well.

I was surprised to hear from him that most people are not feeling better before a month/month and a half.  I wonder if it is a fluke.  I think more accurately that I am doing well because I have a great caregiver, I was prepared before I left with the cooking and housework at a place where it wouldn't be stressing me out when I came home as well.

After we left his office we headed to my brothers house, thanks to Julie and GPS, we located my brother's home and picked up my jacket I left in his car the day of my surgery and then headed back towards Northampton for coffee in the coffee shop that we like to visit and over to the book store.  I have now found two of Anne Rice's books for my collection and picked up a cookbook on Chinese cooking and Pasta two things I have been working on learning.

Today is the worst day that I have had, having awakened around 2:30 a.m. and awake at 4:00 a.m. saying out loud that if I was still awake at 4:30 I was just going to get up and use the computer, instead falling asleep and waking (still stiff, sore and in a lot of pain) around 8:00 a.m., choosing to get up and begin my day as I normally would. on a good day with the idea that lying down was an option if medicine and movement did not lessen my symptoms.

I have been able to attend two programs at the Whitney Center for the Arts that prior to my surgery had left up in the air and non committed to  as I wasn't sure just how surgery was going to hit me, I have written one review and seriously thinking about how I would write the second since the music and performance were very complex and need just the right words to describe.

I barely made it through that performance since my incision decided to let loose a ton of fluids, which had been occurring and necessitated a call to the on call doctor a couple of days before.  Since we already knew what to expect it wasn't as scary as it had been the first time, having been told it was somewhat normal.  The incision leaking had been a factor which almost got me a second night stay in the hospital

It hasn't been "life as usual" but it hasn't been totally horrible either.  I am not running marathons or moving rooms around, but I have participated in life more than I thought I would be.  Last night I was able to join my eldest and his family at the Halloween Parade.  Bundled up nice and warm with my neck collar on I was cozy and warm and it was just short enough so that I was able to stand the whole time without wishing I was someplace else.

My left hand has been numb more than not and it is a good thing I am right handed.  It is bothersome to a small degree and today my neck, back and shoulder muscles are so tight that I just want to shake myself free of feeling like this and am not making any promises about what I am going to do today.

Low key day is in store for me.  I am thankful that I have nothing pressing except for the demands I put on myself which may be no greater than writing this blog and writing my review as well.  Two things that may or may not mess with those muscles.

The other day I had a little emotional meltdown regarding a family matter which is disturbing to me and caused me to fall momentarily into a little black hole of despair, but which did not take me out of the game completely.

I did walk into my favourite store and impulse shop, but instead of spending money, I put a jacket that I liked behind the counter in order to "sleep on it".  That was a couple of days ago.  Today is the day that I decide (after trying it on) whether I am going to act on that impulse or refrain.  It could have been worse, I could have just acted on it that day and given myself one more thing to beat myself up for.

The sun is out and shining today as well which will definitely help change how I feel for the better.  It has been so damp, rainy and cold that it would be easy to fall into that kind of mood and get stuck there.  It could be worse, but I am so glad that it isn't!!!

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