Friday, October 31, 2014


Happy Halloween!!!  Halloween used to be one of my favourite holidays in years past.  I have so many wonderful memories ~ parties, friends, fun, costumes.  Later, bringing my children trick or treating back in the neighborhood which I grew up in since I knew it was safe, and you had to go to the grandparents house as well and show off how scary or cool the kids looked before going out to score the candy.

Since the children are grown up now I have no such obligations, although last week I did go to the Halloween Parade with my granddaughter and her Mom and Dad.  I thought it was pretty lame ~ mostly police and more police with a few floats and some kids in costume, very scaled down from my early childhood memories of the Pittsfield Parade on Wahconah Street which has been replaced with a Tyler Street Parade, but all in all it was a fun time with my family!

I  have always lived in remote places in the past where no children dared come..growing up in West Pittsfield we lived at the end of a long driveway, which even in the daytime was a bit ominous, and my stepfather had a reputation (erroneously) of being scary ~ so no one ever came down for tricks or treats.

Our home in New Ashford was also down the beaten path ~ dark and scary ~ and no one dared enter so we never got children there either.  Since moving back to Pittsfield in 2008 despite living in apartments on busy streets still no children knocking on my door looking for treats.  A couple of years ago I remember pulling a girl with her young child into my doorway as she was walking home just to have the pleasure of giving out some candy.

I am sure this year will be no different.  I have found some of the Halloween decorations but have yet to put up a single one, and frankly, I am not sure that I have the energy to do so.  I am hoping to get a kid or two or else we are going to be rotting our teeth on the candy I bought just in case a miracle happens.

It has been three weeks since my surgery and this has been one of the most difficult weeks as far as my recovery goes.  I think I got lucky the first two weeks of feeling okay and it may have just been the medicine covering up the majority of my pain.

I had the opportunity to review a couple of events at the Whitney and even managed to write my reviews despite not fixing my computer yet.  That needs to wait until I can lift up a computer and have a clear head while I am trying to get one of them to work for me.

I realized two weeks ago when my incision gushed near the end of the Alturas Duos show that I might be overdoing it a bit and was thankful that I had no events that I was committed to do.  I have been taking walks and going for coffee some mornings and trying to do small things around the house to feel useful, while trying to overlook the little dirt piles accumulating around the edges of my rooms.

Since I hate to take medicine I have also been trying to manage my pain with as little medicine as possible, which has gotten me more pain at the oddest times which needs medicine to control.  It is a viscous cycle.

My incision is almost completely healed, although I cannot see it for myself unless someone takes a picture of it.  I have to rely on others to reassure me that it is not as horrible as my mind imagines it to be.  I have also become very vain, a new trait which I hadn't had before and associate that with my vision of how horrible the scar will be.  No amount of reassurance can change my mind about that nasty fact.

I am getting used to wearing the neck brace so that I can make it through the days without added pain from holding up my head while sitting or walking despite feeling self conscious of it,  even out in public if need be.  I do not want to spend the next year lying down as I had after my first surgery 15 years ago.

I am getting used to my left hand being numb most of the time and pray it goes away.  Since I have been home I have been monitoring where I have numbness and pain and noticing that some of it that I had when I first got home has left me and some of it has remained.  I think time will tell.  Overall I feel pretty good ~ better in fact than I expected and I think my Doctor was surprised at how well I was doing after my two week check up.

I hope to get back on a normal writing schedule on my blog as well as my fiction.  I hate the way it is working out ~ last night I opened up a page to begin to write and then went totally blank.  I opted out to go watch a movie instead, promising myself that I would write today even if it kills me!

This Sunday is Opera Notte at the Whitney during the afternoon instead of an evening show.  I am looking forward to going and I hope to see you all there ~ it is always a fun time at the Whitney.  I am really enjoying being a part of the events and sharing them with my readers who are unable to attend.

All and all, life is good, better than I could ever imagine it could be.  I am happy to be happy and looking forward to the future one day at a time.

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