Wednesday, October 7, 2015


Yesterday I left my Doctor's office not deep in thought and concerned about what I should do, rather as I walked down the street towards home, I felt light, carefree and Happy!  That is not to say that I was totally free from all that concerns me, but I have relieved myself from another huge anchor which was weighing me down.  The confirmation is in the mind, body and spirit - all are feeling much better which is the biggest confirmation one can get when making a life changing decision.

Sure, I am sad a little bit that this one little portion of a chapter of my life is done and over with at the Whit at least, but the Whit is just one place off the beaten path with plans that don't really encompass Art other than as decorations for the walls - they maybe should maybe check out Home Goods for that - but even that would be too much of an investment into Art.

Okay, that might have come out a little mean, but realistic for sure!  I learned valuable lessons on top of my learning how much I enjoy putting Art Shows together and seeing the reactions and hearing the comments.

I can tell you that First Friday Art Walk was  a little different for me this month.  Without a show of my own I was not tied down to the Gallery or running around in the lulls trying to check out everyone's exhibits.

At first, when I arrived on North Street I felt odd and out of place.  It felt foreign to me.  So much so that I was halfway home when my phone rang.  I was somewhat despondent when asked if I was going to art walk and support one of my Art friends who was opening her new studio location.

I agreed to meet him there and popped into The Shire City Sanctuary and had a gander at the show there.  It is off the beaten path, but on my way home where I was headed before the phone call, so I was right there.  I didn't have much time to wander down that far normally, so it was nice to have time and the show was a good one.  I always love seeing Crispina who was busy as always finishing up a silk screening  project before the event began.

I met my friends and hung out at Nu Arts Gallery, which is rarely opened anymore - but that will be changing I have a feeling.  Some key artists have departed either to new studios or into home studios and there are a couple of new ones who have taken their places - new artists, new art - always a blessing for me!

It was a great deal of fun to have the time to look and chat and get to know the new faces, and catch up with some familiar ones as well.  I was beginning to feel more comfortable and more myself.  Two good and necessary things.  Worry and fear govern my life and it had been doing a number on me that afternoon.

By the time I left the NU Arts Gallery I was feeling rather fine.  We went off in pursuit of Art.  Stopping here and there along the way, seeing Art I liked and Art that I had to look twice at.  I made it to most places and I think all in all the only show I didn't see was at Dotties and The Museum - both at extreme opposite ends of the street.  I am pretty sure I saw the show in Dotties already and regret not stopping in to see Michael Borniacs pottery - the pictures I saw showed a very good show.

I had seen the show at the Whit earlier that day when I met the Bennett/Roland art couple to return their Art from the September "Partners in Art" show.  I really had no interest in an Auction and there were three pieces I like out of the whole room.  Since I am not a After Art Walk Dance Party girl I headed home without dropping in.

Walking home, I did what I do, I thought about my evening and went over conversations.  I was surprised to find that there is love and support in places which I didn't even know existed.  That carried me through the park and to my front door - happy and carefree, confident and eager to get to work on my next project which has been brewing in the back of my brain.

Thomas and I cooked a very late dinner and watched some more of the 4400 which is heating up and action packed every episode - we are on the final season as of late last night.  Given the time we would have it finished in two more days, but that is going to go on hold for a few unless he cheats and watches it without me.

Yesterday, the weather which had turned cold, damp and rainy from the storm coming up the coast has broken, the sun has been out for a couple of days now, judging by looking out my window, the temperatures have warmed up and I am one very happy girl.

I could not resist wearing shorts yesterday with the warm up, but felt odd with everyone in pants and sweatshirts - they must have been hot, because I was just right!  Anyhow, fingers crossed I won't have to pull pants and sweaters out.  I am not ready for the weather to remain cold and windy.

So getting back to normal is the key to my life these days.  I feel like I found the doorway and walked back through, the only trouble is, I am not sure which side of the doorway I am on, having felt like I have lived in an alternate reality for so long!

Regardless, I can recommend self care and making choices that are right for you.  I know for myself, even though I loved what I was doing, if I continued to slave away for another person who didn't support my efforts in supporting them one more month I probably would have gone mad the way things were going.

It wasn't so bad in the beginning but once you realize that you are killing yourself for someone else who doesn't appreciate it the effect will be bad.  For me, it came close to putting out my flame and I am happy to say my fire is burning as hot as ever!

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