Monday, February 17, 2014


I gave in to my stubbornness today ~ throwing my Independence right out the door and broke down and asked for help.  I called my son and he was asleep, so I called the house and his Dad answered.  He listened to my plea and told me he could give me a ride to the store. I patiently waited until 4:30 and got a ride to the store.

I promised to be quick.  I hate shopping and stores.  We arrived and when we got out of the car I spotted one of my friends from the neighborhood I grew up in.  In reality, I recognized her Mom.  I looked in disbelief at my old friend and we greeted each other and hugged and chatted for a few minutes.

The conversation took longer than the shopping.  I hate putting people out, and I did not want to be too long in the store.  I think Bruce was surprised that I was done so quickly.  I was thankful for the ride there and back more than you know.

I was back in my house, food put away and much less stressed than I was when I was trying to decide where to go and how to get there.  Walking was just not an option today, especially to the expensive supermarket I would have had to walk to.

Instead I spent my food dollars very wisely and got more than I bargained for.  I got everything I needed in the reasonable store which would have cost me 2 or 3 times the amount in the other store.  Now I can rest easy for the rest of the month!

Life really sucks when your resources are limited and for the first time in a long time I find myself really feeling like I am up a creek without a paddle without any way to get where I need to go.  A horrible feeling and not one I like to feel to say the least!

I was so anxiety ridden I looked at my Writing Challenge which I have been thinking about for two weeks and could not concentrate on writing one single word ~ before you wonder ~ no ~ I have not written it, but I will be tomorrow when my head is fresh and clear and focused.

Instead I caught up on my friends blog ~ reading a weeks worth once again as I have been lax in most things.  Overburdened as I had let myself be!

After a wonderful time with  my Granddaughter on Saturday and Sunday where we had no plans and played the time by ear ~ it was nice.  We did Sand Art with the glow sand and when we ran out of sand because I misplaced (and overlooked it in the supplies) we used glitter to finish them off.

We had a nice dinner ~ Thomas slept through it and was still sleeping when we got into our jammies early and went to my room to watch t.v..  We both fell asleep ~ me first I am sure, and when I woke and went downstairs I was surprised to find Tom on his computer, making fun of me for being asleep when he got up.

He was still awake when we got up in the morning, hoping to make it long enough for breakfast, but fell asleep before it was ready!

No problem, it was almost a total girl sleepover!  We ate breakfast and decided to paint some ceramics I had laying around from days gone by.  She painted three before I finished one!  She is 7 and I am older and more dedicated to the details.  We had a nice and casual day until her parents showed up and scooted her away!

The one thing that keeps me rooted in my true self is my sweet granddaughter!  I feel most comfortable, as you know with family and she especially allows me that.  I always wanted a girl and after three boys I finally have one to interact with!

Today, however even the memories of our time could not keep the anxiety down.  I had no choice but to give in and ask for help.  I guess life is easier when you do.  It made my task easier, quicker and I am very grateful for the support even though I don't ask for it.

It is nice when someone has your back ~ Pat's Dad usually does have my back, especially through the toughest of times.  I don't think  I would have made it through Tom being in the hospital without his support everyday the wonderful Dad that he is to all of my boys!  Thanks Bruce for all of your help!

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