My mother was right. I admit it and accept it and give her credit for knowing what I was so blind to see all those years ago when I got involved with the alleged man of my dreams. Despite the cheating, the drinking, the drugs I was too blind to accept and to see then what have the great displeasure acknowledging in my heart and BRAIN!
For a smart person, I am a stupid woman. I overlook the negative aspects of someone and see beyond somehow into what slim good is in them and base my life, love and faith on the wrong things. It has been proven over and over again.
By my friends definition of a person doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results ~ I am crazy! Especially since I kept hoping one person has/had changed, finding out the hard way over and over and over (repeat at least 20 times) again.
It makes me sick to realize. I wish she had passed that intuition off to me through the genes. I also have a broken "picker" according to another friend. It does not surprise me or hurt me when people tell me these things, they are true. Could be part of the reason that my middle son forbade me to date again after yet another failed relationship with another man who is the same kind of man just a different face.
I took the opportunity last (not this) July 4th when I was broken up with by the same offending "man of my dreams" to make a change. Unfortunately, he thought he would be able to get me back same as always but I refused to talk to him, and the only contact we have is in court in front of a judge ~ (some things never change) with me trying to find safety in a piece of paper, which any criminal knows doesn't mean jack ~ they know how to play things their way.
I was of course made to look like an ass as he made an ass of himself in front of the judge blaming me and accusing me of things that are not in my nature. For one ~ he can't put his motorcycle on the road because of me?? Wait ~ your chiropractor told you not to ride it because of your neck and back injury after your second or third or was it fourth accident where you are seeking damages against someone to collect money??
Wait, wait, oh, that is my fault??? I am going to slash your tires?? You steal my belongings, threaten me on the phone, and still watch your D.V.D.'s on MY DVD player?? You wouldn't let me get my things out of your garage and yet when I mentioned it to you before you broke up with me you waited to dump things that don't belong to me on my front lawn, make trouble, steal my house key and who is the asshole????
Classic ~ and my favourite ~ the judge ordered you to pay damages of $30 in my mailbox by such and such a date and you what ~ saw me talking to a male in front of the library so you went to the bank and got rolled coins ~ went to court and said it wouldn't fit in my mailbox. When asked by said judge about the coins you said you rolled them by hand when more than 80% if them were rolled and sealed at the bank you lying piece of shit!!!
Good thing I have faith in god and trust in Karma because you will get yours my friend. I have patience and you are a drug addicted alcoholic who brushes their teeth with beer and while you are a great actor it will come back and bite you and I hope to be on the planet when it does! I don't even need to see it. I will cry over your grave however, because, unlike you, my life with you and my love for you was never fake. Just like my fear of you.
You are not stupid. You are tender hearted and believe there is good in all people. You have always been that way. He will get his. Karma is a real bitch. Just wait patiently for it.
ReplyDeleteHe was conman, who has fooled, cheated and stole from even his "best friends". That's what he has done all his si called life. Your good qualities overpowered any or most of his ignorance. Give yourself a break. I see you doing good things in recent months. I do take notice of all my family, even from the sidelines which is necessary in my life at this time. Keep on truckin!!!
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