Tuesday, December 24, 2013

CHRISTMAS EVE 2013

Christmas Eve...

Oh what  can I say?  This year is totally different from any year yet.  Excited, eager and ready for the holiday and then not so much.  Changes in plans adjustments and all is well for a minute or two.  Get back into the spirit and hang there on a tightrope ~ not sure what to think living on the brink of happy and sad.

I think I am reading too much news.  All of the bad news and the reality of the times on the planet ~ especially the U.S. of A. is great for about 400 people in the country ~ I wonder if they are even here or are they enjoying their holidays away??

I really used to enjoy the bubble I created for myself.  Despite the horrors of the world ~ when you live in blissful ignorance it makes it easier to deal with.  Exposing myself to the "horrors" reading about them, living them as I currently am not one of those fortunate 400 people is really having a negative effect on my attitude and ability to smile.

It seems I am in a perpetual state of trying to trick myself into feeling like everything is okay and can only get better.  After all, things have been worse and I have survived many difficult situations.  The truth is, I feel like I am grasping at straws and the whole pile is falling on my head.

The holidays seem to enhance this feeling.  Random occurrences recently have been leaving me puzzled and weak.  Distractions and good memories are barely making a dent in chasing these blues away today.  I was fortunate to have been taken out of my world this afternoon after a trying experience.

I read a couple of survival mantras today which were very good and on time while I was visiting.  Next time I am there I am going to write them down.  Out of all the pages of all the books the one that was handed to me ~ full of beautiful pictures that would make your mouth water ~ I happen to land on three paragraphs that I most needed to read.  I smiled, then I read them out loud to my friend who agreed it was odd I found those words at this time.

Sometimes the universe puts what you need where you need it when you need it!  I am behind now, but since this is me going with the flow and what is the big deal anyway?  My obligation is a meal and I could bake a ham and create a feast in no time with my eyes closed and one hand tied behind my back.

I have a few gifts for the munchkin to wrap and the hardest part there will be finding some tape.  No rush there since I am not even sure when we are going to see her ~ I am not in charge of the details, my sons will have to figure that one out and I will go with the flow.

I do have to get up the street to see my girl Cindy, whom I ran into today looking mighty stylish coming out of work with her cool hat and her pretty outfit ~ very festive as usual!  She really does have a nice sense of style.  I was going to go up this afternoon after my errands but I had a mishap while I was out and then I got kidnapped and time just slipped away.

I wish my camera was working because today all four of the flowers on one stem opened up and it is simply beautiful.  This evening when I turned on the lights in the dining room I noticed the flowers on the second stem were just dropping.  It looks like I will have something to look forward to up to New Years!

On that thought I will leave you with the hopes that you all have a wonderful, happy and safe Christmas!  

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