Monday, January 14, 2013


The brain is a terrifying thing when it is off balanced.  Watching someone struggle with imaginary to everyone else happenings, being told that you were doing things while you were asleep, when you were just sleeping, and not losing it in the process is a huge struggle for me.

How do you be there for someone who needs medical treatment, who wakes you up to get it and then says you can't come because you will make people think I am crazy is not pleasant at 5:30 in the morning.  Not a good way to wake up on a Monday.  I know I should be at the emergency room right now instead of waiting for a doctor to maybe prescribe something, or who may just say, go to the hospital, tough call, waiting the wait.

Psychosis is a scary thing.  When someone, I don't care how smart, strong or nice you are, crosses into that realm there is no rationalization.  There is no appeasing them.  When you are a trigger for more negative when that is not your normal role, unless it is what that person thinks but is afraid to acknowledge when they are balanced makes me want to cry.

Does it make me crazy as well to be hurt and react to such absurd to me, yet so very clearly not to the person who is expressing them?  How does one not take it to heart?  How do you defend yourself against that?

Shock and triggers.  The brain can only handle what the brain can handle.  I pray for the strength to handle with grace and compassion what is going on in my little corner of life and not end up stark raving mad myself!

If you are dealing with someone with a mental condition, please, no matter how difficult it is, do not give up on the person.  They may look at you as the enemy and push you away when they are in a different state of mind, but in the long run, when everything is back into perspective, it will be okay.  They will remember when the fog clears and know you were there.  Do not be like all of the other people in the world who find it easier to walk away, let the doctors and nurses deal with them.  Maybe go and visit if you can force yourself.   Please do not judge or condemn these people.  They really need your support.  It is a scary time when you reside in that alternate universe.

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