Monday, November 4, 2013


If this day did not happen to me personally I never would have thought it possible to experience and witness such a bizarre occurrence as anything but something out of fiction.  My counselor thought I was making it up!

I began my day early today to head over to a violation of a restraining order from 15 months ago which has been rescheduled once and on for today with my EX.  Court brings out anxiety in me ~ but I had it under control remembering all of the tools I have been gathering specifically for this day to keep calm and be a witness.

Of course we got bumped for a different trial and reschedule to March which left me with no restraining order as it was getting handled today for some reason instead of being extended the last time I was in court ~ the District Attorney Jane  sent me downstairs to go in front of a different judge to take care of that.

I went downstairs and waited in the hallway outside the courtroom as my beloved EX was sitting in the courtroom with his "witness".  Witness to what I don't know because he was not in court the day that my EX violated the restraining order in court the day I was getting a permanent restraining order as opposed to the emergency temporary restraining order ~ many people were in that hallway when he called me a "Fucking Bitch" and many people saw him standing in the doorway trying to intimidate me ~ as a matter of fact I reported it to the court officer who dismissed it and a District Attorney as well who had him move away from the door.  I would say that would be intimidation but who am I according to our court a man can stand in a doorway against another person he has victimized ~ no problem.

So, we get up in front of a new judge for the restraining order who revoked the right to a jury trial and forced the criminal charges after he cleared out his court docket.  Lovely, my representation is upstairs in court ~ no one is around from the District Attorney's office except an Aide who was telling the judge he violated by walking by my house????!!!?????

So long story short, his lawyer gets to represent him, some clueless woman who did not even talk to me once ~ instead chose to gossip with another court worker about a previous case trying to guess how young the lady is that is trying to get a restraining order against her elderly boyfriend ~ way more important than actually doing your job I suppose.

Needless to say when the case was called, Mr. Todd got up there with his lawyer and said he never said or did anything.  His lawyer said that I did not need a restraining order because "She stands in front of his house" which must be what Mr. Bullet was doing there ~ if you consider waiting for a car to pass before I could cross the street at the top of my street and the bottom of his street standing in front of someones house I guess I am guilty.

Of course I do not stand in front of the morons house.  I try to make it by without even seeing or being seen by him but of course living within two blocks of each other and living in a small city you are going to see each other.  Of course they pointed out what a fine and upstanding citizen Mr. Todd is not having been in trouble since 1994 which is the year I took my children and my restraining order to West Stockbridge unbeknownst to him.

I have also been very successful in avoiding him when I had the misfortune of having to come to town before I was forced by circumstances to return to.

Staying out of trouble and not even mentioning and since I had no representation no one brought up the destruction he caused when he left my house breaking the freezer door, coming with the police to get his stuff on the back porch when he forgot his medicine and accusing me of breaking things ~ the gun and bullets -not b.b.'s like he led Officer Steinman to believe, pretending to throw my key in my room so I had to get the police to retrieve it only to have him tell them that he didn't have it ~ but when he got his mountain bike he put my key in the mailbox.

Ordered to have a payment for damages and replacement locks in my mailbox by X date per Court Order and wasting my time and the courts by going to the court with $36 in bank rolled coins which he told the Judge he rolled himself...not having to send it ~ me having to carry it 6 blocks home with my bad neck and back.

Dumping property on my property which was not all my property and what of mine was returned was broken and damaged.  The assault two years before when my son and I both had to go the emergency room when he had a pill/alcohol fueled rampage and the door hit him on the ass when he left and he dropped the a/c and came charging back through the door like a bull and assaulted me and my son defended me and got the tip of his finger bit off.

The threats, the harassing phone calls being almost run down on Lake Street by him on his motorcycle the day before he got served although the restraining order should have been delivered by then.  Coming over to my son's Aunt's porch and telling me to get out of "His City" and off "His Street" cops called reports made but he is a fine upstanding citizen who lives off women and uses most people whom he knows on a daily basis unless "the grass is greener on the other side".  All because I refused to get back together with him or talk to him (which would have led to us getting back together).

Of course, Mr. Todd's attorney is an expert in fear I am sure.  I bet he went to college 55 years ago and learned his psychology.  I am sure that in the 50 years he has been out of college he took classes and became an expert on fear.  Of that I have no doubt~ only the best attorneys in our fine city!

If you have been a victim of domestic violence or abuse you do not have the same precursors to fear, love, happiness any human emotions as far as I am concerned and which I know from experience.  Which obviously we know that I do not have normal reactions to anything and you will never know if I am afraid ~ only I know that and the people that I express it to.

I am resigned to continue to not have faith in the Justice System more and more each and every time I have the wonderful opportunity to see it in action.  I am sure I am forgetting something but the one thing I am not forgetting is what a fucking joke this cities justice system is!

I would cry if I wasn't laughing.  I hope that I will continue to laugh, smile, and breath now that Tommy Todd has his way and "WON" so to speak ~ he does have 90 days hanging over his head ~ but how willing would I be to go through this farce again?  NOT WILLING AT ALL!!!

So Ms. Pittsfield District Attorney Lady whose name I do not even know ~ no interview, no nothing, just wrapped up nicely with a pretty bow for Mr. Todd.  I saw her this afternoon when I was on my way to my counseling appointment and chewed her ear this afternoon.  She apologized and said the case got snatched away.  How lucky for me!  They had his fate decided long ago.  It really sickens me to see how the Good Ol' Boys Club works first hand!

Maybe I should have learned to play the game and lie and cry?  All I know is I would love to get so drunk right now and I do not even drink.  Instead, I will sip on this nice hot tea and rejoice that I do not have to go to court again.  (Silver lining)!

Thankfully, I do have a wonderful support system ~ just no one I would allow to be supportive of me in court ~ I appreciate all the strength I have received from their support.  I think I would have been successful as I was well prepared for the expected part of the day ~ just not the turn of events as they happened.

I will continue to blog and live my life ~ put this behind me and never forget that Karma is a bitch and judgement will come to the evil doer one day.  I am patient and I do hope I am around to hear it's testimony.  I will look for the good and avoid the bad people, places and things and continue to learn how to recognize what that means in my Grey life.

1 comment:

  1. Good for you Hon don't let that get you down ! And if you need anything let me know ! .