Wednesday, August 12, 2015


Today was a much more normal day compared to the two before.  I managed to get the garbage out, but didn't even hear the garbage truck and retrieve my trash can right away like I normally do.  It took a while to get motivated and on track but I managed to get some of my stuff done.

Managing to find time for the important things like the bank, and rent, swinging by Dad's to get the mail,  and remembering Thomas's prescription,  - really the most important thing that is easy for me to forget, checking each one off of the list before I dropped Dad off at Physical Therapy, grabbing some tea and toast during the half hour break after an hour straight going about in a giant circle.

Before I even managed half a tea Dad was done and I was back out and then back home for a minute before walking upstreet and meeting Marney for a much needed break and some girl time.  I don't usually do things like that, but it was great fun chatting and laughing.

Marney is an artist who does some Art Therapy.  I don't know much about art therapy per se but I do tend to do most of my drawing and painting when I am in a certain frame of mind which helps me to relax and take myself away.

My writing is at it's best I am told, when I am in some heightened state of emotion be it happy, sad, out of my mind with anger or frustrated.  I have always used art and writing as tools, but I am not really sure how art as a therapy goes, so I think I will need to check out one of her sessions.

After an hour and a cigarette (someone else who smokes, oh my!) we parted company.  She to do her errands before her class and I to go back home and see how the troops were doing.  My friend Lisa phoned so I chatted with her as I walked - cell phones are great.

I managed to make it through the Common without seeing anyone I knew and would enjoy seeing and also managed not to see anyone I didn't care to see.  Along with my crazy state of mind this week I have also had two unwelcome encounters with one ex and a sighting of the most recent one who instantly creates such anger in me at the whole relationship that I have actually been considering leaving town and never coming back.

Like that will ever happen.  The furthest I ever went was inside the county.  In my mind I travel far and wide, in my life it seems impossible to break free of this place for more than a day.  I know I will never get my Jazz funeral here!

I do digress, however.  I still had to do the pans so that the guys could make some spaghetti and reheat the sauce from last night.  I did manage to cook some hot sausage in between picking my Dad up and meeting Marney, so that they wouldn't have to eat exactly what we had last night.

I had to be at Barrington Stage for 6:15 for my volunteer shift.  I decided to walk and I wanted to wear my sneakers so for the first time ever I just wore black shorts and a black and white top instead of dressing up.

I ran into a girl I know who works in a store on North Street in the Common, it was unusual to see her there.  I went over and chatted with her before making my way to the Theater to check out if I had to stock anything for intermission.

The coffee was made and everything was good.  I wiped up the tables and chairs and had time to kill before the show so I took a walk and had a smoke.  All and all it was a pretty good day, but I was struggling to be my normal self naturally.

I realized this when I was walking and stopped to of course talk to some people and noticed I hadn't even put on any earrings or perfume.  The only smart thing I had done was grab my black blazer which kind of dressed up what I was wearing a little.

Even though I loved the play my heart was not in it.  By the time intermission came I got into the swing of things with an outdoor reception in place of the Greylock Lounge since it was opening night and 75 special guests were expected.

I manned the table pouring soda and punch and handing out bottles of water during the quick 15 minute intermission.  It was a breeze to say the least.  My first job ever when I was 16 was as a waitress in Friendly's and I overcame my shyness with people in a service situation rather quickly for someone who hated to be around most people.

They also train you well and you never really unlearn that.  For many years my fall back job was as a waitress and I could run a room by myself no problem.  It is all in the timing and organization, two skills I normally naturally possess.

I finished up and went back into the play.  It was a combo of two renditions of the same story, the one I know titled His Girl Friday, which was a remake of an earlier play.  I will have to see the earlier play, but what I saw was familiar and well acted, just not Gable and Russell style.  It was good, do not get me wrong - it was opening night and I am sure by the time they play it a couple of more times they will get it.

If you have ever seen the movie you know what I mean, they talk so fast it is a timing thing.  So I hate to even admit this but I left around 9:00.  My muscles were twitching so badly I couldn't comfortably sit still worse than during the first act.

I exited stage left and walked home, realizing I had left the keys somewhere and hoped I didn't drop them out of my bag.  Of course the guys were home and after banging on the door I gained entrance.

They were playing a final hand of Rummy.  Tried to get me to eat, but I am just not hungry after the half a loaf of bread I ate in toast throughout the day and the two oatmeal cookies I ate at the Theater hit the spot to top it off.  (Not the way I normally eat at all!!!!)

We watched the final Peaky Blinders, which is a NetFlicks thing (however you spell it! You all know what I mean and I am too lazy and tired to check it.)  If you haven't seen that series it is a good one.  Now I just need season three since they tied that one up with a pretty bow with a couple of unanswered questions as one would expect.

I still am not facing what I need to face.  That is okay.  I am good with that, for today.  As they say, tomorrow is another day.  I have to meet an artist at the Gallery for some photo's in the afternoon and return a phone call I ran out of time for yesterday and didn't have time for today when I remembered in between one thing and another.

I am trying to stay awake for at least 15 minutes since there is supposed to be a huge array of  meteor showers between 12 a.m. and 4 a.m.  It is unlikely I will catch the later side of it when there will probably be more rather than earlier but you never know.  I may completely forget about it between writing this and making a cup of tea for that matter!

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